2014/05/14: Yesterday I registered for an energetic seminar. This seminar is about healing our internal parts, getting to know our various aspects, and thus create internal harmony. There are still about 6 weeks left before the seminar starts but through registering my decision has been made firmly.
Consequently I have made my intention known and things start to move. I feel an inner strive. There are contradicting dogmas excluding each other but still all residing inside of me. Each of these dogmas does have its own time when being present and dominating my life. However, if all of these dogmas are present at the same time and work against each other then there seems to be a struggle, a fight in me and I am desperate to get out of this situation. But I cannot escape because it happens inside of me.
If there is such an inner strife then it is no wonder that the outer reflection seems chaotic. I am curious to see the progress and what the solution will be like because with registering for the seminar I committed to wanting to solve it now. Therefore I observe it and let it be part of my challenge in order to recognize, examine and eventually dissolve the inner conflicts.
Yesterday I was still in doubt whether this seminar is right for me but today I feel the confirmation that it surely is. By solving these inner conflicts I expect to gain an inner peace I have not experienced so far.
Today somebody send an email saying "Peace is an inside job". I agree. Although sometimes a volcanic eruption is also necessary in order to come back to even deeper peace.
There are so many internal conflicts. Once a medium told me that a public
person - I call him
Mr. Z - is very devoted to the light. I on the contrary had heard that this
person is rather hypocritical and a lot of dark stuff is going on behind the
scenes.
However, by the statement of the medium it became also clear to me that I had generally condemned Mr. Z. I had refused him because I considered him to be dark. Every time the media reported about this person there was outrage and aversion coming up in me. It stimulated my personal strife.
When I heard the medium saying Mr. Z is devoted to the light it confused me a lot. I then went into my heart energy and looked at this person neutrally. And yes, there really was love but also quite dark spots. I wrapped up these dark spots in love and by doing so something in me changed. Mr. Z does not trigger strife in me any longer and it became clear that it is not my job to condemn others for their shadow sides. And besides, it leads to inner conflict instead of peace. I cannot possibly know the big picture or what is going on within another person.
Well, regarding the seminar I had latently decided to take part for quite a while already but levers were set in motion only after I committed to be part of it. Only then it noticeably started to already work in me. This happens by our words or actions. As long as it is a vague thought there is also something happening but by far not as intense. We live in a material world and things manifest in an enormously strong way if we express it in word or action. At the beginning was the word.
Where is my journey heading at? I thought I needed the unconditional basic income to realize what I want to achieve in life. But that is not true. I do not need an external system but I can realize myself in spite of the outer system, in spite of all adversities. I can take over the responsibility for my life regardless of the system I am living in.
The system will adapt to me and not the other way round. I walk my path and all that needs to be overcome will be overcome. It is a matter of learning my lessons rather than fighting or lamenting about outer adversities. No need to blame anyone for hindering me in walking my path.
No, I walk my path and everything that is on the way is part of it and there is no need for outer legitimation. I may and can permit this. In fact I am the only one who can permit this. Nobody else is able to do it. I am the primary authority over my body, my mind, and my soul. I determine what happens in my life. I am the one approving my life. I AM. I have the power, I am ME.
I blamed the system for not being able to live in such a way I would like to. I blamed other people for not letting me be the one I am. But there is no one to be blamed and it does not help because it does not solve my problems. I have to deal with my problems. This is called live and it is my job to overcome my challenges. Only then can I take care of others. It is like being in an airplane when the oxygen masks fall down. First we have to put on our own mask in order to breathe and only then can we assist others. Maybe only a few people have to start putting the masks on and others will follow by observing it.
However, if I am not able to function in this system any longer it might
be helpful to look inside for a way out since there are solutions en masse.
We would not have the challenge if we were not able to overcome it. And if
we cannot do it on our own we will find somebody assisting us.