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Darkness


 

A while ago I joined shamanic meditative journeys which were accompanied by drumbeat. This is a kind of guided meditation and the drumbeat allows to access deep levels of our sub-consciousness. In one of these guided meditations I had the following experience: I saw myself within a different life being a Native American in a tent village together with my people. I was very self-assertive, confident and full of trust. Something was in the air, we prepared for a battle, it was clear we were going to have a fight and there was no doubt about succeeding.

However, what happened then was something none of us had expected. A gigantic dark cloud moved towards us, it became bigger and bigger and devoured everything. All I could do was disbelievingly observe what overran us there with full power. It was pure darkness extinguishing our present life completely. Nobody could have had imagined anything like it. That was the end of the journey and I came back.

Thus, I do not know what the darkness felt like later on or what experiences were to be made there. All I could remember was the life before this great darkness and that it had surprised us, it was bigger and more powerful than anything our imagination could possibly have thought of.

I remember this shamanic journey because recently I bumped into a story of today's Native Americans. What has happened to these people seems allegorical for this planet.

Those people who were in harmony with nature and life itself were exterminated and expelled, their living space completely destroyed. Like the dark cloud in my trip overran everything.

What can be the reasons that we as human beings incarnate in such surroundings? Unquestionably a great challenge looking at all the pain, or the suppression, or the separation. But we still want to know what darkness is like. We want to find out what is hiding there, we want to get to know darkness.

We carry light and darkness within and it is up to us to decide what part we want to live out. But what is light and what is shadow? From an energetic point of view both feels interesting. It is not that one is better than the other. They are different without judging them. Both are interesting experiences.

I find it quite difficult to draw a dividing line and value whether something is of light or of darkness. Too often are we deceived and we are not always immediately able to judge on which side to put an event. And maybe there is no necessity to judge. Maybe it is sufficient to just learn from it. I believe that one of the reasons we incarnated on a planet of darkness is the great potential it offers to get to know it completely. Anyone who finds deep peace and recognizes truth within these surroundings, under these circumstances, despite this weird play, has learnt a lot.

I personally get involved over and over again in the games of darkness very easily, I let myself be provoked, hand my power over to others, become combative, create imaginary enemies whom I fight, judge and condemn … Partly this is due to the fact that I cannot just stand back and watch how we humans destroy this wonderful planet. If this is the case then one wants to fight, rebel, destroy evil and fetch back goodness. But that is exactly what keeps us in the game.

What should we do instead? Peacefully watch how everything goes down the drain? Rather not. We can discover the game behind it and accept darkness for what it is. Instead of rebelling against it we can then on the contrary uncover it through knowing it so that it can dissolve.

If we rebel against darkness we make a bogeyman, feed it with energy and therefore strengthen it. Fear then lets us surrender our power and leaves us incapable of acting. Fighting leads to strife within our being. This feeds our own shadow part and the one of the system making darkness even bigger.

So basically, what is the challenge respectively the chance? It is to discover our shadow parts, to get to know ourselves, and to discover the deception. We face our fear and overcome our fear. We face our hatred, our fury, injuries and overcome them.

If we strive against darkness, sooner or later it breaks our will. It is not about opposition. It is about seeing, about accepting, about truth and knowledge to overcome the deception. This is what leads to peace, since peace is the final goal, peace with oneself, peace with one's internal imaginary opponents, and peace with darkness. Not an easy job, but that is what we are here for.

 

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